Dating On a Dime.... For the Fellas!

I was listening to a radio program where they had set two people up on a blind date. The hosts were following up to see why the girl never returned any of the guys calls for a second date. When they reached the woman she said the date went well, he was a cool guy. So, what was the issue? No love connection…or was she ‘just not that into him’?

She hemmed and hawed and finally spit out the truth. Long, shallow, story short, the guy had pulled out a coupon on the first date, buy one meal, get one free and everybody wins! She was turned off. Hey, he has to watch his pockets too right? She didn’t see it, thought he was cheap and didn’t like cheap men…

Shallow? ABSOLUTELY!

With that said, the truth is, we don’t want to see the coupon – not on the first date. Well, blatant coupon use is only okay once you’ve become a couple. Crazy, I know, but the case nevertheless. His mistake was making it known. Her mistake was writing him off for it. Talk about being harsh! She probably missed out on a really great guy by being superficial.

So, this inspired me to write a post on frugal dating for men. I’m on your side. Dinner for two, a movie (with snacks) could easily amount to $100 if you’re not careful. As your Financial Coach, I just cannot condone spending that much! I reached out to my male Facebook and Twitter friends to help me compile this list…thanks guys!

So, here’s ‘How to Date On a Dime’!

1. By all means – use the coupon! Just pull the waitress to the side – on your way to the bathroom and slip it to her. Let her know you don’t want it to be known and if there is an issue with it, to call you away discreetly.

2. Pick dinner or a movie, not both. If you are doing both, catch the matinee movie. $5 - $7.50

3. Try to go to matinee movies only

4. Dinner – stick to places where you can eat between $8.00 and $15.00 per person, $30 - $50+ per plate dinners are for special occasions. Yes, even if you can ‘afford’ it. (We’ll talk about this more in another post)

5. Seasonal fun - ice skating in the winter, outdoor concerts in the summer … normally equate to a low cost  or free date.

6. Cultural events, festivals, etc. can also be easy on the pockets.

7. Do a little homework, find things to do that YOU can afford. If you leave it up to some women you won’t have any money left at the end of the date.

8. Don’t talk about money, how broke/not broke you are or trying to save during the date – turn off for sure – just plan it out.

Alright fellas, I hope I’ve been some help – let me know how it goes!

Your Financial Coach,

- Dorethia
www.connercoaching.com

Change? - No Thank You.

We all balk at change sometimes. No matter how progressive we are or how flexible, there are times when we wish things would stay the same. I experienced  this recently while entering one of my favorite
remote-office-coffee-house locations. I rushed in, secured my spot and could not wait to order my favorite sandwich. A wonderful chicken salad variety on honeywheat bread! I'm getting hungry thinking about it! Well, they no longer served it! But politely offered me another version that was creamier and included almonds and cranberries. NO THANK YOU! The original was PERFECT to me....why did they have to mess up a good thing?

Some of us are experiencing this in our finances. We were doing fine or getting on our feet, when something unexpected invaded our lives. Whether it is an illness, job loss, or other blow to our financial progress, we have to adapt, regroup, and find another route to overcome the situation. Remember that there is ALWAYS a solution - NO situation is hopeless. Don't get discouraged by having to start over, just be diligent and you will be surprised at how quickly you recover!

~Dorethia

Make a great impact this Christmas! Give the Gift of Financial Coaching! http://www.connercoaching.com/
________________________________________

Black Enterprise Magazine Feature Celebration Thank YOU!

Last Thursday, I celebrated being a Featured Financial Allstar in Black Enterprise Magazine. We filled Java Exchange Cafe in Detroit's Midtown and had a wonderful time! A big THANK YOU to everyone who came out to celebrate with me or sent words of congrats via phone, email, twitter, facebook, linkedin, etc....lol!

It was a fun night, starting off with Money Bingo! Yes, a very crucial round where seasoned competitors vied for great giveaways such as: 365 Ways To Live Cheap by Trent Hamm, Zero Debt by Lynette Khalfani and Brand YU Life by Hajj E. Flemings

Hajj Flemings shared with the audience the importance of building your Personal Brand. He challenged each of us to tap into our hidden potential and unlock the inner genius, which has nothing to do with IQ, but the God-given talent we all have. Hajj also spoke on the importance of celebrating the success of others because we want the same in return. It was inspiring.

We ended with mingling and connecting a few businesses in the room with folks who could use their services.
I was elated and humbled by the show of support from everyone - THANK YOU ALL! I've enclosed a link to the pics from the event - enjoy!   Check Out The Photos Here!

Visit:

• Dorethia Conner Financial Coaching
• Hajj Flemings, Author, Brand YU Life 
• Java Exchange Cafe

Up and Coming:
I've begun a series of Podcasts and Teleseminars, October's 'Raising Money Smart Teens' was held this month and received a great response.

The November Podcast/Teleseminar is 'Don't Manage Your Debt - Get Rid of It!'
Register here: http://nomoredebt.eventbrite.com/ to be notified of date and time of this event.

IN THE MEANTIME...if you or someone you know wants to make an empowering change in their finances and learn how to manage their money THEMSELVES... call me! ~Dorethia

dorethia@connercoaching.com
http://www.connercoaching.com/coaching.html
800.962.2491

Answers to Your Money Questions

Here are a few questions that I've received from my email bag. Do you have questions you'd like answered? Send them to info@connercoaching.com!

1. Are U.S. Savings Bonds still a good way to save money for the future?

I would suggest mutual funds as a better investment. Savings bonds are thought to be safer, but in actuality the variable rate they have can fluctuate quite a bit causing a great deal in losses.

2. How much money is considered an Emergency Fund?

Your initial emergency fund is $1,000. Once you have saved this amount, you stop adding to this account and begin to get out of debt. Pay off everything except your mortgage. Once you are out of debt, you go back to your emergency fund and add 3 – 6 mos. expenses, not income. This gives you a cushion in case of job loss, illness, or other unforeseen event.

Sidebar -- I’m hearing a lot of advisors say in this economy you need 9 – 12 months of expenses saved. While I don’t argue with this fact, I suggest 3 – 6 mos as a starting point.

3. What is the most effective way to handle cash?

When you receive cash, you should allocate it for a purpose. If there’s no bill to pay – add it to your emergency savings or other savings goal. If you have your $1,000 emergency fund and there is outstanding debt, additional cash should be put toward paying debt down from the smallest to largest amount.

4. When I reach one financial goal, how do I plan for bigger goals?

You would simply budget for your bigger goals. For example: If you want to start a business or currently have a business in addition to your ‘day job’- write out how much it will cost you start/run the business. Begin to set aside money each pay toward it. It would be the same for any financial goal, (retirement, vacation, mission trip, etc.). First calculate how it fits in your budget and designate a dollar amount each pay for it.

5.  My car is paid off, should I now remove the full coverage policy for a no-fault policy which is cheaper?   This would give me extra money to pay down debt.

If you have enough money saved to replace the car (for cash) without tapping into your emergency fund, you can remove the full coverage. Otherwise, it is better to be safe than sorry - keep your full coverage policy!


Visit: http://www.connercoaching.com/
Twitter/Facebook: Dorethia Conner

Branding and Social Media - Brand Camp University

This past weekend I had the opportunity to attend Brand Camp University - Personal Branding 2.0. It  was an awesome event! Branding and marketing experts converged on  Lawrence Technological University in Michigan and downloaded a wealth of information. I thought I'd share a few nuggets with you. First, branding is not just for entrepreneurs and corporations. In his book BrandYu Life, Hajj Flemings, (Founder of Brandcamp University), states that each of us has a brand. Branding is simply what we are known for, what people think of when they see or hear about us. Branding is the image portrayed.

The lineup of speakers was awesome and I walked away with a lot more information than I could possibly share here, but have outliined a  few helpful points for the individual or entrepreneur wanting to maximize their BRAND using Social Media such as Blogging, Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Ning sites, etc.

Hajj Flemings, Author of BrandYu Life - There's a genius in you! You're just as smart as the next guy, if not smarter. Don't worry about what others are doing, thinking you won't have significance - you will!!!   Get your GRUSTLE on!!!!  Grind + Hustle = Grustle

Work your day job (GRIND), but tap into a talent or a dream and work that too (HUSTLE)

Hajj's Website: www.hajjflemings.com/blog

Mitch Joel, Author of Six Pixels of Separation - Be authentic. No need to copy anyone else and with social media(facebook, twitter, blogs, etc.) you'll be found out a lot quicker. Find the real you – your value goals and beliefs – live in authenticity. Stick to what you are passionate about - it will propel you further. One point Mitch made that resonated with me was TALK TO STRANGERS! I have met so many cool, interesting people just by striking up a conversation and you can too. You never know who it is you are standing next to and if possibly you all can help each other at some point.

Mitch's Website: http://www.twistimage.com/blog/

Rohit Bhargava, Author of Personality NOT Included  - Gave excellent insight into the process of book writing. He also shared how he was able to get Guy Kawasaki, who does not write book forwards, to write his!

He discussed how the book idea came from sharing a random coffee with a random person and ended up leading to one of the major successes in his life. (Back to talking to strangers)  

Rohit adamantly encouraged us to not limit ourselves because we are afraid of what others will say and to find our twist, what's different about you or your business and what you offer. Good Stuff!

If you are an aspiring author and want an example of a book proposal visit http://www.personalitynotincluded.com/

Ken Brown, Author of A Leap of Faith - I've heard Ken speak several times and each time he brings so much energy you are ready to conquer the world!!!! He said he travels the world setting people on fire and that's exactly what he did at Brand Camp! Ken shared how his parents began having children as young teenagers and although their family lived in poverty, they would not let their children have a poverty state of mind. All five of their children finished college. He encouraged us to have passion - vision - purpose. To know our WHY and write our own story, create our own Personal Brand. 

Visit: http://www.kenbrowninternational.com/

Scott Monty is the head of Social Media Marketing at Ford Motor Company. He spoke about using social media to market your business. Several useful tips he shared:

• Have a blog
• Find forums and blogs that people in your industry write or comment on and join the community.
• Each time you post to a forum or blog, be sure to leave your signature line w/company website, etc.
• My tip here: Don't make your signature line too long - name, email, maybe phone - If you add your entire biz card people will roll their eyes and keep moving.

 Scott's Website: http://www.scottmonty.com/

 

April Holmes, World's Fastest Amputee, WOW ... is one way to describe April Holmes and it would not be enough. April had been running since she was five years old, but in 2001 she was in a train accident that caused her to lose her leg. While she was recovering,  a doctor gave her a booklet on the Paralympics. She shared a video detailing her journey to the 2008 Beijing Olympics and winning the Gold that was truly inspiring. It was difficult to keep a dry eye. THEN she passed around her Olympic Gold Medal, telling each of us we can have our own gold medal, whatever that may be for us. She told us to take a picture with hers so we would never forget that.

April's Website: http://www.aprilholmes.com/ - check out videos and pics

Valeria Maltoni – Marketing Blogger for Fast Company Magazine - Told us we should all have a Personal Board of Directors as suggested in Jim Collin's book 'Good To Great'. She also shared ways to connect to new prospects by evaluating: 

• Who you know
• What they are looking for
• Where to connect (online, networking events, etc)
• When to follow up
• Why they should talk to you

Valeria pointed out that professional associations and groups were great to be involved in, but don't stop there. Building relationships online allows you to have one on one conversations as opposed to competing with others in a room full of people. This gives you a greater chance of getting the job or the client.

Visit: http://www.conversationagent.com/  

Bob Fish aka Biggby Bob! Owner of Biggby Coffee Shops, shared with us a case study of how Biggby came about. It was very interesting to see how he's grown from the initial coffee shop in Lansing, Michigan to build a franchise.

"If you want money you go get it with conviction" – Bob went to 9 banks before being approved for a loan.  He didn't have all the answers before starting Biggby Coffee, but had conviction. He didn't know how much money he really needed and his biggest challenge was running out of money. He had to get rid of cars, catch rides, and couldn't  pay his mortgage in the beginning. Key point - conviction is convincing – your authenticity and passion speaks volumes and will lead to success. He eventually gave up his office (literally) to go on the road and interact with customers and employees. 

Biggby Bob Mission: Every customer leaves the store in a better mood than when they arrive.
http://www.biggbybob.com/

Resources:

Thanks to Hajj Flemings and Brandon Chestnutt for putting on such a great event.  Check out Brandon's Blog here: http://brandonchesnutt.wordpress.com/ 

Check out this link for books recommended by the various speakers: http://bit.ly/aSuGs

The common theme from each speaker was to be you, be authentic and go after your passion. My summary does not do this event justice, but check out the speakers and the suggested resources. They are sure to help you maneuver building your brand (be it personal or business) in a social media atmosphere!

Freebie ~ Celebrate w/Dorethia ~ Cool Biz Tools

Free Teleclass:
Raising Money Smart Teens
When I talk to parents, one of the biggest issues with their teens is that they don't 'get it' when it comes to money. Which is why I'm offering a free Teleclass for PARENTS who want useful methods, tips and tools to help their teens EARN, SAVE, and APPRECIATE money!

So when your house has settled down for the evening and your cell phone minutes are free - call in!

Sign up and then share on your Twitter/Facebook pages and email lists! 

Register Here!: http://www.moneysmartteens.eventbrite.com/

Date: Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Time: 9:00 p.m. - 10:00 p.m. est
Dial: (712) 432-0800
Pass 1081228#


Celebrate w/Dorethia Afterwork!
This month, I am a featured Financial Allstar in October's issue of Black Enterprise Magazine - pg. 66 (YAY!) I am grateful to the magazine and want to see all of you ....so let's get together after work!

Let's meet Thursday, October 22, 2009:
5:30 p.m. - 8:30 p.m.
Java Exchange Cafe
440 Burroughs
Detroit, Michigan 48202
Phone: (313) 822-6456

We'll  shoot the breeze, meet new people, listen to a little music and have a little fun - you'll have a chance to win prizes @ bingo w/a twist.  Oh, we can't forget about the food! Great food/coffee/tea/water @Java Exchange  and they are offering a cool $5 sandwich combo deal! (You must try the King David Sandwich!)

Please Register Here -  http://afterworkcelebration.eventbrite.com/ - Free to join me but we want to make sure there's no fire hazard!!

An apology to all my clients and friends who live out of state and can't celebrate w/me in person - don't worry - I'm coming to a city near you soon!!

Midnight Ramblings....
I was up late working one evening and began thinking about the number of people who follow through after I've helped them plan their business startup.  Not because they didn't have great ideas or startup money, but because being an entrepreneur is hard work. For those thinking you can get up when you want to, go on vacation at random and there's no boss to bother you - there's a rude awakening. You will work harder than you ever have for an employer when you start your own business. There are long nights, your weekends aren't really and rarely do you go on vacations in the beginning. As for not having a boss...trust me your household bills will ride you to produce much worse than your boss!

The entrepreneur who has a plan and can hold out those first few years will succeed. Holding out means serious strategic planning on paper, knowing when a bad idea needs to be scrapped and being surrounded by people who can give sound advice. Mistakes will be made and that's okay, you just have to be able to bounce back. For  those who want a 10 - 2 workday, annual vacations and guaranteed benefits...eh... keep your day job. But if you know that you want to create a product or provide a service that has YOUR name on it and is beneficial to your market - go for it!  Yes, you will suffer from sleep deprivation and your social life may come to a screeching halt for a while - but the long term payoff is worth it!

As for the planning on paper bit... check out this post Finish Your Business Plan in 3 Months

Cool Biz Tools I Like:

• Talkshoe  - cool podcasting and teleconference site
• Hostgator - webhosting - great rates and the best customer service I have ever received!
• Urban Interns - the name says it all
• Dimdim - free netmeeting 

Let's Connect!   Twitter/Facebook


Thanks! -Dorethia
dorethia@connercoaching.com

CONNERCOACHING.com

Musings of a Financial Coach......

I had an interesting conversation with a good friend of mine this morning about what it takes for some people to 'get it' and move toward reaching their goals and why others don't. He got me to thinking about my role in helping people overcome financial hurdles…and what being a financial coach means for me. This is what I came up with....

I’m not a financial counselor or therapist… I’m not the one to pat your hand, rub your back and join the ‘poor baby’ pity party. I can’t do it, it doesn’t fit my personality. A coach pushes you to accomplish your goals. Sometimes that means they have to get in your face, look you square in the eye and tell you what nobody else will. Don’t misunderstand, I am a compassionate person, I’ve been there and I feel your pain. But I’m not going to let you roll around in it. Nope. What good does that do? None – zero, zilch! There’s no time to beat yourself up…I've never seen the value in rehashing mistakes you’ve made with money or old strategies that didn’t work.

The only thing we have time to do is make the future better than the past. What is your goal now… today? Got it? Write it down and let’s make THAT happen!

1. Ask yourself - what’s stopping you from achieving your financial goals?
2. Know where you are financially - write down all your income, expenses and debt.
3. Write down where you want to be financially in 1, 3, 5, 10, 20 years.
4. Read about, listen to and learn, as much as you can about money management.

Remember - it's not going to happen overnight, take small steps, don't get discouraged and you will see progress!

 

~Dorethia

 http://www.connercoaching.com/